Our son-in-law's Grampa died of Covid two nights ago. He was in the hospital, on a ventilator, and they would not allow any of the family members in his room, not even his wife, so the poor guy had to die all alone. This is just sick and wrong.
Tragedy
- Thread starter dreadnut
- Start date
Sorry Dread. that's a tough one. So hard on the family members I would suspect.
Very sorry for your family's loss, Dread. My dad was on a ventilator for 5 weeks, but miraculously pulled through. All he remembers from his time on the ventilator were his dreams, which to him were very real. In fact, when he regained consciousness he thought he can been in a car accident because he dreamt I told him that.
If it's any consolation to your family, he was probably unaware of anything that was going on and did not feel alone. That said, it's a cruel situation. Very hard on the hospital staff as well.
If it's any consolation to your family, he was probably unaware of anything that was going on and did not feel alone. That said, it's a cruel situation. Very hard on the hospital staff as well.
Rich Cohen
Senior Member
I think the hospitals should allow at some the closest relatives to be present when the patient is about to expire. It's the right think to do.
Yeah, when does compassion trump protocol?
Nuuska
Enlightened Member
Inexcusable rude of hospital.
EDIT - after reading what Midnight Toker wrote in post # 15 - I will eat my previous words that were expressed w just human feeling - because they were uttered without ANY knoledge of what's going on in hospitals.
A truly sorry situation.
EDIT - after reading what Midnight Toker wrote in post # 15 - I will eat my previous words that were expressed w just human feeling - because they were uttered without ANY knoledge of what's going on in hospitals.
A truly sorry situation.
Last edited:
Jake The Loafer
Member
My condolences to all involved..
At our State Veterans home they have a program called "No Vet Dies Alone." We only have one Vets home in Michigan's Lower Peninsula and it is in my town, Grand Rapids. So Vets from all over the state come here to live, and often their families are so far away they can't be here a lot. With this program, a volunteer befriends a Vet that is dying and is there to hold their hand and pray over them when they die. I can't think of a more noble task.
JohnW63
Enlightened Member
I don't know why properly masked up and vaccinated people can't come to the persons room. It makes no sense.
ruedi
Senior Member
Dread, very sorry for your family's loss. Some of the restrictions are really beyond comprehension.
A tough way to leave - hard to understand some rules.
Sorry for your loss, dread.
I foresee some lawsuits coming for the hospitals.
Midnight Toker
Senior Member
- Joined
- Nov 7, 2021
- Messages
- 1,859
- Reaction score
- 3,310
- Guild Total
- 2
So sorry for your loss. 
I've lost a few friends to covid...sadly all just before a vaccine was available.
One of my best friend's wife is an ICU nurse at Johns Hopkins and she's been dealing w/ daily covid deaths since early last year. It breaks their heart knowing these patients all have families that want to see them...but they also fully know the reason why these protocols exist. It doesnt matter if you're simply masked and vaccinated. It's not like going to the grocery or in a regular section of a hospital. That covid ward is full of nothing but patients who are absolute worst case scenarios....and in the case of an airborne virus and potential spreading, it's by far the worst place you'd ever want to be. She's lost several coworkers...both nurses and doctors to covid! She basically has to strip down in a contained changing room, put on a complete hazmat suit from head to toe, w/ fully sealed face mask, She spends 8-12 hrs a day in a space suit. Any break they get doesn't even give them the time to go through decontamination.....so, she uses that time to connect families w/ patients via facetime on an extra ipad she bought w/ her own money that stays in the covid ward just for that purpose. They know the protocols seem harsh, but when you see just how many people they are trying to save on a day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute basis, there's just no time to review allowances on any case by case basis. There simply has to be a set of rules, no matter how inhumane, for everyone. Heck, until there was a vaccine, she was coming home to her husband and daughter....and she lived a solitary life quarantined from them in a makeshift converted apartment in their garage for fear of what she might be bringing home to them. They went close to a year living like that!! It wasn't easy. Puts an incredible strain on their relationship, their daughter, and the family as a whole. This whole thing sucks for everyone. One of my childhood friends that died last Dec 20'th...(54 years old, 4 sons in college), not only did they not get to see their father while in the hospital, during the funeral, they had to remain in the limo while they watched him being buried from afar. There was no service.
And as for lawsuits....sorry to say...protocols like these are actually to prevent lawsuits.
I've lost a few friends to covid...sadly all just before a vaccine was available.One of my best friend's wife is an ICU nurse at Johns Hopkins and she's been dealing w/ daily covid deaths since early last year. It breaks their heart knowing these patients all have families that want to see them...but they also fully know the reason why these protocols exist. It doesnt matter if you're simply masked and vaccinated. It's not like going to the grocery or in a regular section of a hospital. That covid ward is full of nothing but patients who are absolute worst case scenarios....and in the case of an airborne virus and potential spreading, it's by far the worst place you'd ever want to be. She's lost several coworkers...both nurses and doctors to covid! She basically has to strip down in a contained changing room, put on a complete hazmat suit from head to toe, w/ fully sealed face mask, She spends 8-12 hrs a day in a space suit. Any break they get doesn't even give them the time to go through decontamination.....so, she uses that time to connect families w/ patients via facetime on an extra ipad she bought w/ her own money that stays in the covid ward just for that purpose. They know the protocols seem harsh, but when you see just how many people they are trying to save on a day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute basis, there's just no time to review allowances on any case by case basis. There simply has to be a set of rules, no matter how inhumane, for everyone. Heck, until there was a vaccine, she was coming home to her husband and daughter....and she lived a solitary life quarantined from them in a makeshift converted apartment in their garage for fear of what she might be bringing home to them. They went close to a year living like that!! It wasn't easy. Puts an incredible strain on their relationship, their daughter, and the family as a whole. This whole thing sucks for everyone. One of my childhood friends that died last Dec 20'th...(54 years old, 4 sons in college), not only did they not get to see their father while in the hospital, during the funeral, they had to remain in the limo while they watched him being buried from afar. There was no service.
And as for lawsuits....sorry to say...protocols like these are actually to prevent lawsuits.
I appreciate your post, Toker. So many variables to contain. I know everyone is doing the best they can.
Wow:
news.google.com
Austria orders nationwide lockdown for unvaccinated
The Austrian government has ordered a nationwide lockdown for people who have not been vaccinated against COVID-19, a measure aimed at slowing the fast spread of the disease in the country. The move, going into effect at midnight on Sunday, prohibits unvaccinated individuals older than age 12...
news.google.com
And please get your flu shots, especially old farts like me! I got my Covid booster and my flu shot on the same day, no problem except a sore shoulder for a couple days.
The again. I've also had my pneumonia shot and my shingles shots. I'm hedging all my bets!
Covid has killed 5 million world wide so far, but the 1918 Spanish flu killed 50 million!
My Dad was born in 1921, about the middle of the pack of 18 kids. Interestingly, none of them ever got the Spanish flu. But they lived up North in Michigan out in the boondocks, farmed all their own food and basically never went anywhere,
The US annual flu death average is upwards of 50,000, but it was drastically reduced the last 2 years because of all the Covid precautions. There's a lesson in there somewhere...
The again. I've also had my pneumonia shot and my shingles shots. I'm hedging all my bets!
Covid has killed 5 million world wide so far, but the 1918 Spanish flu killed 50 million!
My Dad was born in 1921, about the middle of the pack of 18 kids. Interestingly, none of them ever got the Spanish flu. But they lived up North in Michigan out in the boondocks, farmed all their own food and basically never went anywhere,
The US annual flu death average is upwards of 50,000, but it was drastically reduced the last 2 years because of all the Covid precautions. There's a lesson in there somewhere...
wileypickett
Enlightened Member
I've read a couple books on the Spanish flu -- it's hard to grasp just how devastating it was.
There was some discussion of guitarist Lonnie Johnson on another LTG thread recently. Born in the 1890s, he was one of 11 children, all of whom (along with his mother and father) played music. He toured the UK for two years and returning home to New Orleans in 1919, discovered that, except for one brother, his entire family had perished in the flu epidemic of 1917.
I've lost a few friends. One of the hardest things for survivors is not being able to celebrate, to memorialize the lives of loved ones.
There was some discussion of guitarist Lonnie Johnson on another LTG thread recently. Born in the 1890s, he was one of 11 children, all of whom (along with his mother and father) played music. He toured the UK for two years and returning home to New Orleans in 1919, discovered that, except for one brother, his entire family had perished in the flu epidemic of 1917.
I've lost a few friends. One of the hardest things for survivors is not being able to celebrate, to memorialize the lives of loved ones.
So sorry for your loss.
One of my best friend's wife is an ICU nurse at Johns Hopkins and she's been dealing w/ daily covid deaths since early last year. It breaks their heart knowing these patients all have families that want to see them...but they also fully know the reason why these protocols exist. It doesnt matter if you're simply masked and vaccinated. It's not like going to the grocery or in a regular section of a hospital. That covid ward is full of nothing but patients who are absolute worst case scenarios....and in the case of an airborne virus and potential spreading, it's by far the worst place you'd ever want to be. She's lost several coworkers...both nurses and doctors to covid! She basically has to strip down in a contained changing room, put on a complete hazmat suit from head to toe, w/ fully sealed face mask, She spends 8-12 hrs a day in a space suit. Any break they get doesn't even give them the time to go through decontamination.....so, she uses that time to connect families w/ patients via facetime on an extra ipad she bought w/ her own money that stays in the covid ward just for that purpose. They know the protocols seem harsh, but when you see just how many people they are trying to save on a day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute basis, there's just no time to review allowances on any case by case basis. There simply has to be a set of rules, no matter how inhumane, for everyone. Heck, until there was a vaccine, she was coming home to her husband and daughter....and she lived a solitary life quarantined from them in a makeshift converted apartment in their garage for fear of what she might be bringing home to them. They went close to a year living like that!! It wasn't easy. Puts an incredible strain on their relationship, their daughter, and the family as a whole. This whole thing sucks for everyone. One of my childhood friends that died last Dec 20'th...(54 years old, 4 sons in college), not only did they not get to see their father while in the hospital, during the funeral, they had to remain in the limo while they watched him being buried from afar. There was no service.
And as for lawsuits....sorry to say...protocols like these are actually to prevent lawsuits.
This was beautifully written. And 100% consistent with my experience. Thanks for posting this, Toker.