Predictable but don't recall hearing it exactly like this before

[fronobulax]

What's the difference between a guitarist and a 16" pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of four.

 

[bluesypicky]

BWAH AH AH AH AH!!!!!!! (Heard it before, but it never gets old)

 

[chazmo]

Hahahah. Right on!

 

[ruedi]

:highly_amused:

Another one: Jerry Garcia and Eric Clapton got captured by cannibals. Before they are prepared for eating, they are granted one last wish. Jerry whishes:
"Please give me my guitar and let me perform one last time my solo from "Dark Star".
"Ok, so be it. Eric, what's your whish?" asks the cannibal.
- "Please kill me right now!"

 

[The Guilds of Grot]

What's the difference between a guitarist and a 16" pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of four.

Works better with a Drummer!

 

[fronobulax]

Works better with a Drummer!

What did the drummer get on their IQ test?

Drool.

 

[walrus]

What did the drummer get on their IQ test?

Drool.

...said the bassist...

walrus

 

[fronobulax]

...said the bassist...

walrus

The band leader broke up a fight between the drummer and the bassist.

What's this about? the leader asked.

They changed one of my tuning pegs, the bassist replied.

So?

They won't tell me which one.

 

[Nuuska]

How can you tell the stage is levelled? - bass player drools on both sides of his mouth . . .

How do you describe a gentleman? - He can play accordeon - but will not.

What is the bass players head good for? - So the strap won't slip.

 

[freddyfingers]

These are pretty good.

 

[Quantum Strummer]

Works better with a Drummer!

Saw Aimee Mann in April 2017…at one point a guitar DI crapped out and she solicited musician jokes from the audience while a replacement was getting hooked up. This very joke, the drummer version, was the first or second one told. :applouse:

Edit: I misremembered this…the jokes came while guitars were being tuned between songs. (But the DI thing happened too.) Also forgot that a clip of it is up on YouTube: https://youtu.be/0uBlnD-pc8I

-Dave-

 

[Bernie]

A guitarist might provide less to eat first night Frono, but it could last for much longer...:smile-new:
Tell the wives

 

[dreadnut]

Banjo perfect pitch = when the banjo hits the bottom of the dumpster.

 

[adorshki]

Banjo perfect pitch = when the banjo hits the bottom of the dumpster.

HEY!
Some of my best friends became banjo players!
Now they're not my best fiends any more.

 

[geoguy]

I thought "perfect pitch" was the sound you hear when a banjo is tossed into a dumpster, & it lands on an accordion . . .

 

[jp]

How did I miss this musician joke thread? My favorite drummer joke:

What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?


You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once.

Disclaimer: This joke does not condone violent behavior towards drummers. :C)

 

[adorshki]

How did I miss this musician joke thread? My favorite drummer joke:
What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once.
Disclaimer: This joke does not condone violent behavior towards drummers. :C)

Right. That privilege is reserved for the bassist.

 

[shihan]

The most important phrase a (drummer, bass player) can learn?
”Do you want fries with that?”