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Thread: QI knowledge

  1. #1

    QI knowledge

    Some nurse humor from Jimmy Carr and Jo Brand on QI series K


    A nurse found a rectal thermometer in her pocket and said “Oh no, some a#@$ole’s got my pen!”


    A nurse comes running in and says to the Matron “Oh dear, I think I’ve gotten something the wrong way ‘round. You asked me to prick someone’s boil.”


    What’s the difference between a rectal and an oral thermometer?
    The taste
    Chris

    56 A-50, '57 CE-100, ‘58 A-350, '60 X-150, ‘60 SF II, '61 M-20, '62 F-20, '64 S-50 Jetstar, '64 Mark II, '65 SFIV, '71 S-90, '75 F-112, '75 Mark IVp, '81 M-80, '82 S-275, ‘87 Nightbird I, '88 Detonator, ‘92 F-15ce, '93 X-500, '97 Bluesbird, '99 F-30, ‘14 NS Aristocrat, '16 NS T-bird
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  2. #2
    Senior Member davismanLV's Avatar
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    YIKES!!! LMAO!!!!
    Tom in Vegas

    Use the good china. Life itself is the special occasion.

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  3. #3
    Senior Member walrus's Avatar
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    Great, more stuff to worry about if I'm back in the hospital...

    walrus
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  4. #4
    Senior Member JerryR's Avatar
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    Suits my sense of humor

  5. #5
    Senior Member dreadnut's Avatar
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    Old boy says "Doc, I can't hear squat out of my right ear!"

    Doc says "Well no wonder!" and pulls a suppository out of his ear.

    Old boy says "Well, I bet I know where my hearing aid is now~!"
    TODAY is the TOMORROW you spent all day YESTERDAY acting like there was no.

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  6. #6
    A runs into the psychiatrist office and starts babbling; "Wigwam, teepee, wigwam. teepee! The Doctor says; "calm down and try to relax, you're too tense!"

  7. #7
    Senior Member Guildedagain's Avatar
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    To get pretty nurse, one must be patient ;-)

  8. #8
    Senior Member adorshki's Avatar
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    Gynecologist to patient's spouse:
    "By golly you're right, it does look like an Edsel!"
    Al
    "Time May Change the Technique of Music But Never Its Mission " - Rachmaninoff
    My 1st Guild: '96 Westerly D25NT "Hally" (10-31-96 stamped on heelblock)
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    All bought new!

  9. #9
    Refresher; Why did the doctor use two fingers for a prostate exam?

    He wanted to get a second opinion.

    Ralph

  10. #10
    Senior Member adorshki's Avatar
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    Proctologist to nurse: "I need a light"
    Nurse hands him a can of Miller.
    "No, nurse! I meant a Butt light!"
    Al
    "Time May Change the Technique of Music But Never Its Mission " - Rachmaninoff
    My 1st Guild: '96 Westerly D25NT "Hally" (10-31-96 stamped on heelblock)
    #2: '01 Westerly F65ce "Blondie"
    #3: '03 Corona D40e Richie Havens "Richie"
    All bought new!

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