Can't win...

Graham

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To Be 6 Again...

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife, looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her Birthday.

'I'd like to be six again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a day!

He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being six again??'

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. 'I meant my dress size, you dumb ass!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong.
 

Default

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My girl just made it back to a 4 petite after quite a few years of being, ah, not a 4 petite. She is a very happy woman!
 

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Graham said:
Default said:
My girl just made it back to a 4 petite after quite a few years of being, ah, not a 4 petite. She is a very happy woman!

Well put. :wink:

Coming up on my 20th year anniversary with her, and that wasn't from being a slow learner. :)
 

Graham

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Default said:
Graham said:
Default said:
My girl just made it back to a 4 petite after quite a few years of being, ah, not a 4 petite. She is a very happy woman!

Well put. :wink:

Coming up on my 20th year anniversary with her, and that wasn't from being a slow learner. :)

26 here, I think, :shock: still dodging bullets. :mrgreen:
 

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Graham said:
26 here, I think, :shock: still dodging bullets. :mrgreen:

25 this fall. Finding her a D-25 has not given her GAS although she can taste the difference between a 12 and a 15 year old Glenfiddich single malt, something neither of us drank 24 years ago.
 

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Guildmark said:
Graham said:
The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong.
"If a husband speaks in a forest, and there is no wife around to hear him, is he still wrong?" - Anonymous

"Only a man would ask that."- Anonomous woman
 

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1184807322_kat1.gif
 

Carol

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I wear a size 6 shoe... that's the only part of me that is a size 6! The funny thing is that I feel like a cow when I'm in America... but when I'm in Ireland, I feel like a goddess! Men over there actually LIKE a good behind they can get "hold of" and (trying to put it delicately) a nice set of hooters. In the US, sometimes I think men prefer women who look like boys. I'm not sure what's up with that!
 

JerryR

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Carol said:
I wear a size 6 shoe... that's the only part of me that is a size 6! The funny thing is that I feel like a cow when I'm in America... but when I'm in Ireland, I feel like a goddess! Men over there actually LIKE a good behind they can get "hold of" and (trying to put it delicately) a nice set of hooters. In the US, sometimes I think men prefer women who look like boys. I'm not sure what's up with that!

Your solution to a happy life is simple - emigrate to the Emerald Isle. You like Irish music - so you can play fiddle, pipes (yest the Irish have them too), squeeze box, bogrhan and even the guitar, to your hearts content, dring lots of guiness and have lots of male appreciation :!: But would you trust another Irishman :?:
 

The Guilds of Grot

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If I was in Carol's shoes, (a petite size 6 I might add!), I'm not trusting any men for a while. Well, except maybe us LTG'rs, and even then, that's from a safe distance! :D
 

coastie99

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Carol said:
I wear a size 6 shoe... that's the only part of me that is a size 6! The funny thing is that I feel like a cow when I'm in America... but when I'm in Ireland, I feel like a goddess! Men over there actually LIKE a good behind they can get "hold of" and (trying to put it delicately) a nice set of hooters. In the US, sometimes I think men prefer women who look like boys. I'm not sure what's up with that!

Something deeply Freudian going on there !
 

coastie99

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The Guilds of Grot said:
If I was in Carol's shoes, (a petite size 6 I might add!), I'm not trusting any men for a while. Well, except maybe us LTG'rs, and even then, that's from a safe distance! :D

And certainly, no men from near Stonedandunhinged !
 
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